Selected Epigrams
I.1 (To the Reader)
You ask me, reader, why I write such short poems.
You would prefer something longer? The truth is:
my little books do not demand your whole day.
You can read them while sitting on the toilet.
This is their purpose: to be brief, and to amuse.
I.32 (On Lina's purchased beauty)
You buy your hair, and you buy your teeth, Lina.
You buy everything—and then you say:
"I am not rich enough to buy a husband."
I.47 (On a bad poet)
You recite your verses, and I am silent.
Do not think that I am admiring them—
I am merely trying not to fall asleep.
II.86 (Mutual recitation)
You read your poems to me; I read my silence to you.
We both feel insulted—but for different reasons.
III.4 (On the good life)
I do not want to be rich; I do not want to be famous.
Give me a little farm, a few slaves, a modest table,
a wife who is faithful, and a glass of wine—
and I shall be as happy as the king of the Persians.
V.34 (On the stingy host)
You invite me to dinner, Cotta, but you eat all the best dishes yourself.
You eat the oysters, the mushrooms, the boar, the turbot—
and you give me the leftovers. You think this is hospitality?
Next time, invite someone else—or eat alone.
VI.11 (On the passing of time)
You keep putting off the day when you will begin to live.
"Tomorrow," you say. "Tomorrow." But how many tomorrows
have you already wasted? Life is short, and every day
that passes is a day subtracted from the total.
Begin to live now—or you will never begin at all.
VII.10 (On writing poetry)
I write verses, but I do not think that I am a poet.
A poet is someone who writes well. I write for amusement—
and if my verses amuse you, that is enough.
X.47 (On travel)
You say you will travel to the ends of the earth
to escape your troubles. But wherever you go,
you will find that you have brought yourself with you.
You cannot escape yourself by changing your location.
The trouble is not in the place—it is in the man.
XII.34 (On friendship)
A friend is someone who tells you the truth,
even when the truth is unpleasant. A flatterer
is someone who tells you what you want to hear.
The first is rare; the second is everywhere.
Choose the first—and you will have a real friend.